First, I mentioned in my last post that I`d give you a second definition of Bad Boys in Japan. This kind doesn`t have to be boys or even male. These are your out-and-out Japanese toughs who make your skin crawl just to think about. [Yeah I realize the headline says Chinese but cut me some slack, I`m photo-impaired here]
There was a crime, Japanese style, committed by one of these toughs in my presence just yesterday. I shall elaborate.
Kyoto, the only Japanese City in which I have spent any time, has two types of streets: Major thoroughfares, which appear every, what, 6-8 city blocks, and minor streets, which is everything else, and which you and I (in the U.S. I mean) would call an "alley." This doesn`t stop cars and trucks from using them as true thoroughfares, but most of them strain to allow cars to pass each other in opposite directions. I checked it out and figured they`re about the width of a single interstate lane which is, I think, something like 20 feet.
The fact that they are only 20 feet wide, and that`s pretty much wall to wall -- it includes pedestrian and bicycle room, does not stop Japanese people from thinking of them as streets, because functionally they are. The thing is, intersections of Major Throughfares, the big wide ones, with any other street, large or small, calls for a crossing signal and crosswalk area.
I hope you`re getting the picture, because when you combine the lit wait/walk signal (a red person standing or a green person walking) with the Japanese obsession for obeying the rules, or, really, being part of the group (and I want to be clear that I am in love with this philosophy, at least so far), there are at any given alley crossing, two to ten or more people standing to wait for the alley light to change.
There may be bicycles approaching down the alley. There may be taxis or trucks. Or, as is usually the case, the way may be clear for, well, all day. There are just no cars on the alley. And there are 5-8 people on each side of this alley crosswalk waiting patiently for the light to change. It is SO precious to me I can`t stand it.
Enter the tough. This is the kind of guy who in the U.S. is cutting throats for cigarette money. You know who I`m talking about.
The tough will, without a care in the world, cross against the light without even hesitating, after looking carefully left and right to make sure there`s no traffic in sight. The other pedestrians, in Japanese fashion, give no hint of their thoughts, but it doesn`t take a genius to tell that they are disgusted by this total want of group spirit.
There are the normal scofflaws as in any society, of course. These are the ones here who, usually at the intersection of two major thoroughfares (an area roughly equivalent to that of the Montana state fairgrounds) venture into the crosswalk lanes a full half-second before the crossing light changes. As I said, you find these devil-may-care people in every society and there`s nothing you can do about it.
Sidewalk Bushido
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| No resemblance to John Belushi, who was Albanian |
Like all great discoveries, this one came about entirely by accident.
In Japan traffic direction is according to the British system -- left side of the road. As a result, the general unwritten rule is that pedestrians and cyclists also use the left side. Especially on crowded sidewalks this works pretty well (One day I`ll tell you about getting in line to get on the subway car).
As a confirmed rule follower, I always stick to the left side on the sidewalk. It works very well. Usually.
Here comes the Sidewalk Samurai. He stakes out the right side of the sidewalk, his right which is my left. So we're taking the same sidewalk lane, and headed for each other. Here he comes. He`s clearly not moving. We tough it out. I`m not moving, he`s not moving. It`s a Japanese game of chicken. I have the right of way but he`s a Samurai.
I bow to superior moral strength. He has defeated me. It`s almost always a he, usually in middle age. With the elderly women Sidewalk Samurai I don`t get in a game of chicken, because when I see them coming I swerve immediately. They win I lose.
I do have one recourse, my own form of bushido if I want to avail myself.
It has to do with the fact that these people are DYING to stare at the tall blond foreigner but in Japan as elsewhere it`s impolite to get caught staring. My form of sidewalk, or subway, bushido, is to do what everyone here does, which is look elsewhere, anywhere but into the eyes of another person. I would do that, for example, on the sidewalk, until I they get close and I suddenly look them in the eye and catch them staring at me!!! Hyyyyyyyah!!!!!!!!! As it happens, though, I`m wayyyyyyyyyyy too mature to do anything so juvenile. I`m just saying that I could do it if I wanted to. I`m also saying that you can take it on faith that these people are staring at me when I`m not looking at them. I won`t tell you how I know though.
Six minutes left on computer A.
I had a great moment today. I took some shirts to the cleaners (no, that itself is not a great moment, I know). I took them in because I walk everywhere, and this beeing a very hot, sunny and humid rainy season, if you know what I mean, after 15-20 foot miles my shirts can get, you know, somewhat laundry worthy.
Anyway, I found out where the laundry was and took these shirts there this morning. And what do you think? The guy spoke no English. Couldn`t or wouldn`t, I have no idea, but this whole conversation was in Japanese. How many shirts, how much per, when would they be ready, everything you chit-chat with the laundry person about, you know, that was all in Japanese, no retreat to English. It really was uplifting to me. All that study paid off at the laundry man`s place. Because if I don`t launder those shirts I`m not getting close enough to the Japanese natives even to be tempted to use my gaijin sidewalk bushido. Now I feel better.
As I said up top, my rail pass kicks in tomorrow and I`m away from my computer until Sunday.
That`s all. Nine seconds left. See you Sunday.
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